OCD Action

slogsweep
Member

Morning all,

Thanks to all of your support and wonderful advice I've been feeling better recently. Not 100% but able to function normally again. But I feel guilty for feeling better, because these thoughts were so shameful I shouldn't have the right to feel better. Does that make any sense to anyone? If anyone could offer any advice that'd be fantastic.

Best wishes, have a lovely day everyone,

Slog

Thu Dec 15 2011 10:58:02 #
Tess
Member

Hi slog
My interpretation is that the OCD is just attacking you from another angle and you deal with it in the same way as all other OCD thoughts - don't engage with it and don't try to rationalise it or you may just end up reinforcing it.

Thu Dec 15 2011 11:52:51 #
slogsweep
Member

Thanks Tess, I'll try. How are you doing?

Slog

Thu Dec 15 2011 11:56:04 #
Tess
Member

Hi Slog
I've got flu - one of the positive things about OCD is that it makes you realise that flu is a very minor problem.

Thu Dec 15 2011 12:17:40 #
slogsweep
Member

oh no! Get well soon Tess, and that your OCD goes with the blasted flu!

Thu Dec 15 2011 15:20:07 #
Truddles
Member

Sorry to hear that you've got flu Tess. Get well soon

Thu Dec 15 2011 16:55:04 #
Tess
Member

Oh wouldn't that be lovely Slog - but we've had some good news this afternoon, we took our injured guinea fowl back to the vet to check progress on it's broken leg (it got trodden on by a goat four and a half weeks ago) and it has healed so well that the vet took off the splint completely and it is now back home running round getting used to having an unbandaged leg.

Thu Dec 15 2011 16:58:10 #
wannabefree
Member

That is good news Tess, good stuff... Hi everyone, yes, I feel guilty when I lift... There are people in the world far worse off than me, and yet OCD makes me down... Especially at Christmas I tend to look back on the sad events of the year, and that makes everything bittersweet... I live in contrasting colours to those around me, I pick up on the sad things, which takes my feelings of happiness away from me... OCD is an absolute pig to deal with, like you say Tess, flu is a doddle compared to OCD... That isn't to take anything away from you Tess, do get better soon...
wannabe

Thu Dec 15 2011 17:16:17 #
slogsweep
Member

I'm pleased for your guinea fowl Tess, strange how many animal lovers have OCD tendencies. I'll be getting either a hamster, gerbil or guinea pig soon, my first pet of my own.

I know the feeling of Christmas being bittersweet Wannabe. Whenever I have a long time off where seemingly I have little to worry about, my OCD inevitably gets worse.

Best wishes
Slog

Fri Dec 16 2011 20:08:36 #
wannabefree
Member

Hi Slog, yes, it is difficult... People at Christmas try to be ready to enjoy themselves, and Christmas inevitably becomes a let down... We expect way too much of it, and when it comes we aren't ready for it... Guilt takes an upper hand when we realise someone who got us a prezzies has been forgotten... The programme the Royle family is typical I guess, of so many families... We try too hard, and end up feeling useless... Hopefully there will be some good stuff on telly, some cheering up stuff, some happy go lucky stuff, to lift our spirits... If we don't expect too much of it, we'll be okay...
I try to make it last a week rather than just try and cram everything into two days...
wannabe

Fri Dec 16 2011 21:32:51 #
swan
Member

hi,
I dont feel guilty when i feel better but anxious anyone else feel like this?

Sun Dec 18 2011 20:04:46 #
blueboy
Member

i have to admit i dont feel guilty about feeling better.. i had years of feeling broken up so i am enjoying a free mind..its new for me... like i have had a clear out of junk in my head...the s,a,d is now what i'm dealing with and i only got up around 4/5 this afternoon... was up all night... cant get back on track.
sorry you got flu, tess.. take lots hot lemons and whiskies

Sun Dec 18 2011 20:23:49 #
wannabefree
Member

Hi everyone, i try not to feel guilty... I don't think it is fair for us to feel guilty... The truly guilty don't care at all, and don't suffer like we do...
wannabe

Sun Dec 18 2011 21:14:46 #
slogsweep
Member

Hi everyone,

I should have elaborated further, I have past tense OCD, I always worry that I've done something wrong before. By guilt I probably meant anxiety Swan, you're not alone. Could you describe exactly how you feel?

I begin to doubt I deserve to feel better, and then ruminate and do compulsions as if I'm ill again .

Beating myself up has always been a habit of mine. No confidence or self-esteem. I can live without those, but I can't carry on all my life with OCD. Hope to God CBT works.

Best wishes, hope you're all well,

Slog

Sun Dec 18 2011 21:50:23 #
wannabefree
Member

Hi slog, just assume for now that it will, keep the hope alive... It WILL be worth it...
wannabe

Sun Dec 18 2011 22:39:21 #
slogsweep
Member

I really, really hope so Wannabe, thank god for these forums. I feel a downer coming on but being on here always helps.

Best wishes

Slog

Sun Dec 18 2011 23:02:30 #
wannabefree
Member

I agree, Thank god for these forums...
Time to get some sleep... Time to chill... Time to relax...
night night,
wannabe

Sun Dec 18 2011 23:14:49 #
Truddles
Member

Beating myself up has always been a habit of mine. No confidence or self-esteem. I can live without those, but I can't carry on all my life with OCD. Hope to God CBT works.
If you want to stand any chance of making the CBT work in order to conquer the OCD you will need confidence and self-esteem. It's our lack of confidence and self-esteem that helps to perpetuate the OCD. Beating yourself up is a sign of low self-esteem and most of us with OCD tend to do it.

There's an excellent book that you could read whilst you're waiting for your CBT, it's called Overcoming Low Self-Esteem by Melanie Fennell.

Mon Dec 19 2011 0:20:37 #
wannabefree
Member

That sounds like a good idea, Trudy... I've got a book somewhere by Melanie Fennell, I'm not sure if it is that one though...
wannabe

Mon Dec 19 2011 21:24:26 #