OCD Action

OCDLONELY
Member

I wanted to know how many of us keep our ocd or aspects of it i.e rituals and compulsions a secret from loved ones and friends. I know myself I keep so many secrets from my family. If they knew the extent of my behaviors they would be shocked and probably disgusted. I spend everyday trying to hide the things I do and not to be seen. I just wanted to know if I'm alone. Take care everyone

Daniel

Tue Oct 14 2008 17:26:13 #
Marie
Member

Hi Daniel
I keep most of my ocd a secret and have not told any of my family about my thoughts ect I just dont think they would understand. You are not alone as
this illness is often referred to as the secretive illness. Hope this helps
Jane

Tue Oct 14 2008 21:39:09 #
Unregistered

Dear Daniel, You are certainly not alone. I think the majority of us hide many of our compulsions (and thoughts) from our families and friends. It is a very secretive condition, because we know that people who have not experienced it often do not understand. And we can be judged, which adds more pain to what we already have due to the illness.

I confided one of my compulsions just the other day. I told my mother something I had never told her before. I'm not really sure what she felt, she didn't appear upset, but she told me I should see my doctor immediately and ask to be admitted to the local psychiatric hospital.

Some people can be very empathetic, the problem is it's very hard to know until we have explained our situation, and then we can't take the words back, if we don't receive the reaction we had hoped for.

Love, Tricia x

Wed Oct 15 2008 8:33:28 #
StephenONLINE
Member

Daniel,

My family know but then they didn't have much choice as I live with them My work bosses know as I had to take time off work because of OCD. A few close friends know but most people who know me don't. If they have to know something I use the generic term stress to explain any oddness I do. Best to only tell those that need to know or those that you really trust.

Wed Oct 15 2008 11:48:31 #
anxiousgal
Member

Hi everybody!

Well some of my family and friends know about my OCD but recently when I discovered they won't have any idea of the extent of the problem! For example I had a friend who had hit tough times and wanted to stay at my house and he hasn't been here and seen how cluttered it is also was hard to talk to my family as I don't' think they have any idea either! Of course Ian who lives with me knows all about it but I'd say outside of my therapist and some of you guys here and people at OCD support group nobody would know the extent! I do though tell people I have OCD when I won't shake their hands, some take it bad some take it well but I make no apologies for it!

Luv Natasha

Wed Oct 15 2008 12:06:20 #
LauraC00KIE
Member

I try to hide my skin picking from absolutely everyone. Although I manage to do an okay job covering it up with make-up, I'm sure people (family, friends, boyfriend, coworkers) notice and wonder why my scabs just won't heal. It's horrible and humiliating, but I'd rather have them silently wonder than confront me about my weird habits.

Wed Oct 15 2008 17:16:11 #
Hester
Member

I used to be incredibly secretive about it. But lately I have told quite a few people I know. This is because it's something my flatmates really need to know, and also my closest classmates in case I have a problem attending any of my lessons. Other than that, I prefer to hide the truth really.

I think it's difficult to tell people, because even if you think they'll be supportive of you, you can never be sure and the OCD will keep telling you that there is something badly wrong with you when there really isn't.

Wed Oct 15 2008 21:05:14 #
anxiousgal
Member

[quote="LauraC00KIE":8o6u9nmt]I try to hide my skin picking from absolutely everyone. Although I manage to do an okay job covering it up with make-up, I'm sure people (family, friends, boyfriend, coworkers) notice and wonder why my scabs just won't heal. It's horrible and humiliating, but I'd rather have them silently wonder than confront me about my weird habits.

I have the same thing with self-harm but I have actually told a few friends because I think they get suspicious when you always have plasters and bandages/tubigrip on your arm. I have alot of wristbands and armwarmers for when it's too warm to wear long sleeve tops so people and friends don't ask questions! I go through phases of self-harm then stop then start again but luckily nowhere near as bad as I was. I used to cut other places than my arms too. Self harm is definitely one of those things people don't understand either I think!

Luv Natasha

Thu Oct 16 2008 11:41:57 #
anxiousgal
Member

[quote="Hester":38sfaj1u]I used to be incredibly secretive about it. But lately I have told quite a few people I know. This is because it's something my flatmates really need to know, and also my closest classmates in case I have a problem attending any of my lessons. Other than that, I prefer to hide the truth really.

I think it's difficult to tell people, because even if you think they'll be supportive of you, you can never be sure and the OCD will keep telling you that there is something badly wrong with you when there really isn't.

Hi Hester!

I hope you are well!I think it is good you have told your flatmates and classmates as they could think your being weird or fussy if you didn't, at least they know it is a condition you can't help now. I totally agree with the OCD telling you there is something wrong with you, even though I know its OCD I still think I am going crazy sometimes!

Luv Natasha

Thu Oct 16 2008 11:45:48 #
Dan9
Member

I kept my OCD secret for a long time, but eventually my family found out, though we've had very few discussions about it and I haven't told them any details about it. They do see me doing some of rituals sometimes, but I try to be as discreet as possible!

Thu Oct 16 2008 17:19:42 #
stevieb
Member

Hello Daniel

Only one or two good friends know I have OCD, and I don't feel any shame in talking about it with them. I only tell those I trust not to ridicule me. My family don't know I have it, even though I know they'd be sympathetic. For some reason, I wouldn't feel too comfortable telling them, unless they suspected it and asked me.

No-one at my workplace knows I have it, as I don't display any notable symptoms, although there've been a couple of occasions recently when I've washed my hands twice in front of others, like dried them with a paper towel, then washed them again, as I thought I saw blood on the fresh paper towel, so was afraid to eat my sandwiches until I had.

Thankfully, this is rare, and I don't think anyone took any notice. I don't really know what I'd say if someone said to me "Why did you just wash your hands again?" I think I'd be a bit embarrassed, and a bit annoyed with them, because its none of their business.

Hester, I think it was brave of you to tell your friends about your OCD. I hope they will continue to be more supportive and understanding towards you now.

Natasha, hope you're okay.

Best wishes all,
Steve.

Thu Oct 16 2008 22:22:11 #
brennie
Member

Daniel , hiya mate how are you hunny ? Your definately not on your own in keeping those rituals / compulsions to yourself, we feel that those repulsive and senceless acts that we perform are so bizare that we like to keep most of them secret to ourselves.
I really hope and pray that you will be able to fight your fears and come into the Bethlam when your admittance date comes through because there are many others on the Longfield Unit that have your same symptoms, which i think your stay at the Bethlam could help you tremendously, and o.k. perhaps there may not be any promises of a cure !! but just a little improvement could give you a better quality of life and YOU owe yourself that Daniel.

love brennie x

take care and please consider comeing in here seriously, i know its frightening but try hard to " feel the fear and do it anyway "

Fri Oct 17 2008 10:55:15 #
anxiousgal
Member

[quote="stevieb":32t4df3v]Hello Daniel

Only one or two good friends know I have OCD, and I don't feel any shame in talking about it with them. I only tell those I trust not to ridicule me. My family don't know I have it, even though I know they'd be sympathetic. For some reason, I wouldn't feel too comfortable telling them, unless they suspected it and asked me.

No-one at my workplace knows I have it, as I don't display any notable symptoms, although there've been a couple of occasions recently when I've washed my hands twice in front of others, like dried them with a paper towel, then washed them again, as I thought I saw blood on the fresh paper towel, so was afraid to eat my sandwiches until I had.

Thankfully, this is rare, and I don't think anyone took any notice. I don't really know what I'd say if someone said to me "Why did you just wash your hands again?" I think I'd be a bit embarrassed, and a bit annoyed with them, because its none of their business.

Hester, I think it was brave of you to tell your friends about your OCD. I hope they will continue to be more supportive and understanding towards you now.

Natasha, hope you're okay.

Best wishes all,
Steve.

hi Steve!

Yeah I'm ok thanks!Hope you are well yourself!

Luv Natasha

Fri Oct 17 2008 11:05:01 #
Hester
Member

Unfortunately one of my flatmates did make an insensitive comment (they meant it as a joke but of course I took it badly) and ended up crying for ages. But when they saw how upset i was they appologised immediately. He admitted that he didn't really understand, but things are okay now. I was really upset with him but I'm feeling much better about things now because at least they know how I feel about everything.

Hester xx

Fri Oct 17 2008 20:05:30 #
stevieb
Member

[quote="Hester":3dbd6iva]Unfortunately one of my flatmates did make an insensitive comment (they meant it as a joke but of course I took it badly) and ended up crying for ages. But when they saw how upset i was they appologised immediately. He admitted that he didn't really understand, but things are okay now. I was really upset with him but I'm feeling much better about things now because at least they know how I feel about everything.

Hester xx

Hello Hester.

I'm glad that your flat mate apologized for his remark about your ocd, so hopefully now there'll be no more of them. Some people can make silly comments which upset us, but without actually meaning to upset us. Some people just don't think, but still have a conscience.

Glad things are better for you now.

Steve

Fri Oct 17 2008 21:56:50 #
stevieb
Member

[quote="anxiousgal":2ot2ezxr][quote="stevieb":2ot2ezxr]Hello Daniel

Only one or two good friends know I have OCD, and I don't feel any shame in talking about it with them. I only tell those I trust not to ridicule me. My family don't know I have it, even though I know they'd be sympathetic. For some reason, I wouldn't feel too comfortable telling them, unless they suspected it and asked me.

No-one at my workplace knows I have it, as I don't display any notable symptoms, although there've been a couple of occasions recently when I've washed my hands twice in front of others, like dried them with a paper towel, then washed them again, as I thought I saw blood on the fresh paper towel, so was afraid to eat my sandwiches until I had.

Thankfully, this is rare, and I don't think anyone took any notice. I don't really know what I'd say if someone said to me "Why did you just wash your hands again?" I think I'd be a bit embarrassed, and a bit annoyed with them, because its none of their business.

Hester, I think it was brave of you to tell your friends about your OCD. I hope they will continue to be more supportive and understanding towards you now.

Natasha, hope you're okay.

Best wishes all,
Steve.

hi Steve!

Yeah I'm ok thanks!Hope you are well yourself!

Luv Natasha

I'm not too bad, Natasha, but have had a grueller of a day at work, and didn't leave in good spirits, which I should have been able to do. Still, I'm calmer now, thanks.

Steve x

Fri Oct 17 2008 21:58:04 #