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forum Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

Peoples thoughts

(3 posts) (3 voices)
  • Started 1 year ago by Hb
  • Latest reply from sarah81
  • This topic is Not a support question

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    Hb
    Member

    I have had awful thoughts that have contracted HIV while in Africa nd it made worse by my sexual intrusions. Help

    Thu Aug 12 2010 15:51:31 #
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    Unregistered

    I can't help, sorry dude.

    Thu Aug 12 2010 16:52:08 #
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    sarah81
    Member

    Hi Hb, I struggle with paranoia about HIV as well. It is extremely distracting. I vacillate between fears of me or someone I love being infected, or fearing that I am infected and will unwittingly infect someone else. I don't know if you have truly put yourself at risk for HIV or not, but here are some examples of things that have caused me to take HIV tests (all of which have been NEGATIVE):
    - accidentally peeing on a toilet seat on an airplane and having the pee splash back at my genitals, thus worrying that there could have been blood on the seat that I didn't see and it somehow jumped back up at me
    - vomiting into a toilet and having some toilet water splash into my eyes
    - finding a spot of blood on the side of my panties (the part that goes over the hip bone) when it wasn't my period, worried I might have contacted some hiv blood somehow
    - eating a lemon ice drink that had a small drop of something pink mixed into it (blood?!)

    I have never had any known exposure to HIV in my whole life, and have only had one sexual partner who I know is HIV negative, yet I feel I have taken more tests than the average adult porno film actress.

    I could probably go on and on. The list is endless. My fears became worse after I had children, as I now worry about them as well as about myself.

    This probably doesn't help much, but please know you aren't alone. I do have months (sometimes years) when I don't worry as much, so I hold out on hope that things will get better. Best wishes to you.

    Thu Aug 12 2010 19:46:36 #

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