OCD Action

JayZee
Member

I have an elderly relative who has, over the years, become a hoarder. The matter has gotten much worse recently and the relative is unable to move around their house because of all the "accumulated junk". I have heard that hoarding is a very difficult condition to treat, and would like to hear from anyone else on the forum who also has a relative/acquaintance, that is a hoarder, and how, if at all, they managed to get the problem under control ?
Many thanks

Mon Jul 27 2009 12:58:00 #
Unregistered

Hello JayZee, I have also heard that hoarding is difficult to treat. However, as you are perhaps aware, hoarding is now believed to be slightly different from OCD. Researchers are getting very close to the genes responsible, apparently, closer than with other OCD symptoms. A friend of mine has just been told by a psychiatrist involved in research that successful drug treatment for hoarding is not far away.

However, that's not much help right at this moment with your relative's problem. I suppose the question is, and please don't take this the wrong way, does your relative actually say they want help? I know an elderly lady who would put up quite a fight if her relatives tried to help her with something which, although a problem to them, is not one to her. She is surrounded by junk and seems content that way. I am also a hoarder, and wouldn't seek treatment for it. That's not to say I am unaware that many hoarders are suffering and would want help.

Mon Jul 27 2009 14:21:10 #
JayZee
Member

Hi Tricia
Many thanks for your reply.
Up till recently, my relative didnt seem bothered by her hoarding, but now it has started to cause her distress and she has actually said how she wishes she could stop hoarding. All the whilst her hoarding never bothered her, it never bothered me, but she has since confided in me that the hoarding is making her depressed and making her life difficult, hence my concern.

Mon Jul 27 2009 23:53:44 #
Unregistered

Hello JayZee, Has your relative ever had any therapy? Would you be prepared to help her? There are different approaches to this. Some experts encourage people to clear whole rooms in one go, without even checking what it is they are disposing of. I think that's drastic, although I know it can be effective (I don't just mean the speed it empties a house, but treating the problem). I think it would be too traumatic for me. Others encourage baby steps. Does your relative keep total junk that even she can see no purpose for? I do have rubbish (not kitchen waste as such, but empty bags and old papers etc) which although I am prepared to throw away I feel a desperate need to thoroughly check first. It once took me three hours to remove just enough to fill one rubbish bag. When my husband sorted out a pile of junk, when I was not at home, I felt quite traumatized when I discovered what he'd done. I was very stressed for several days. But then there was a sense of relief that he had cleared it for me. If I had been around I could not have faced it.

Tricia x

Tue Jul 28 2009 14:34:13 #
JayZee
Member

Hi Tricia !
Thank you for your reply.
My relative has not had any therapy - like many elderly people, she is terrified of doctors and hospitals. I think however, that she may be coming to terms with her hoarding, as she has, of her own accord, contacted a charity shop and asked them if they would like to come to her house to collect some of the stuff that she has collected over the years, so that they can sell it. This is a breakthrough for her and I praised her for her courage in taking the first step.
She does not keep rubbish - her hoarding consists mainly of bric a brac, books and clothes, hence if she does give the charity shop some of her stuff, at least someone will benefit from her hoarding.
I think it does us good to have a clear out from time to time, and, like you, I dont like throwing things away, but once I have come to terms with the fact that the 'unwanted' items are gone, I too feel a whole lot better, and can finally let go and move on.

Tue Jul 28 2009 23:37:50 #
Moocher
Member

It's good that your relative has contacted a charity shop to take some of her stuff. Maybe if she just throws out a few items everyday. That is the most difficult thing I think, getting started.
I've been clearing my stacks and stacks of newspapers and magazines and it's absolutely back-breaking. If I knew it would be this much hard work to clear them I never would have started the collection.
Maybe you could help her to sort out some of the stuff.

Thu Jul 30 2009 13:35:17 #