OCD Action

nettlenoo
Member

hi everyone im feeling very nervous today, im looking at a new place to live and im tip top scared. i want to leave where i live as it isnt big enough for our needs as a couple but in some ways i dont want to leave. since ive been ill my little flat has been my sanctuary the place i cut off the rest of the world, I know this is my ocd me not wanting to change but im worried all this will trigger anxiety attacks again and ive been doing real well with them. any advice would be greatly appreciated
much love to you all
netti xx

Fri Feb 19 2010 7:44:42 #
Unregistered

Hi dear Netti

Moving is stressful I agree but I have found all my moves good for my OCD. I have seen them as a positive new start and have left my past failures behind in the old house.

Look forward to this exciting new start in life. With more room you will be able to spread out all those wonderful hobbies of yours.

Best of luck
Love
Anne.

Fri Feb 19 2010 8:11:58 #
Unregistered

Hi Netti
I've moved home quite a few times, each time to escape the OCD I'm ashamed to admit, but of course this is never possible.
You say you want to leave where you are now because you need more space. I was the other way round, wanting to downsize because there would be less to clean!
If the extra space is important to you I don't think you need fear losing your sanctuary because as soon as your personal possessions are in the new home it will become a new sanctuary.
It can help to write down all the things for and against your existing home and the new one and compare them before committing yourself. Think about location, finances, services, internal layout, neighbours. Think of the things you like about where you live now and if the new home offers all this and more then it may well be a sensible move. Only you can make the decision but moving is stressful and it really helps if you feel motivated beacuse you are looking forward to living in your new home. Making your living space pleasing to you is helpful especially if you suffer with depression so my advice would be to try to plan in your mind how you want to use the extra space, your decor and furnishings and to try to concentrate on this rather than worrying about anxiety attacks which may not happen.
I have never once regretted any of our moves, each has been a new start with a different set of challenges, we have moved away from old problems and gained new ones each time - now, at long last I have found a home in which I feel settled and I really hope you do too, best of luck, Joyce

Fri Feb 19 2010 11:54:47 #
mama
Member

When I moved from my home in California to my current place, it was hellish. I was so overcome with fear and panic attacks, and I had a 3 week old baby on top of it. I was just starting on Paxil (which I've decided is the devil) and was more out of control than I had ever been. How could I box things I couldnt even touch!? I called an old dear friend who happens to be a therapist...she said 'oh dear...well, I know you Andrea, and you are one tough lady...you've always been strong...you can do this...It seems like you can't, but you must. Try and allow friends to come and help...I think you will need to. It will be okay, and you CAN do this.' Somehow I knew she was right. I put off help till the last minute because I was scared to death of contamination...no one was to come in! Finally, I gave in days before the truck arrived. My dear friends saved my bacon, an I discovered something I still try to use today when I get boxed in. Having a 'normal' person around helps me to function more 'normally'. Somehow I get more courage or something, and I am able to do previously impossible tasks.
Perhaps you have a friend who will look at it like an adventure and will gladly help you prepare. You are not weak if you ask for help. Just the opposite actually. If the overwhelming task is part of your problem...it may help to find a friend you trust to help. You might keep OCD under your hat so they dont enable rituals and you might surprise yourself with what you can accomplish.
Andrea
PS This move was the best thing I ever did for my OCD...new place, new people, new start to getting better. FANTASTIC!

Fri Feb 19 2010 14:15:20 #
Truddles
Member

Hi netti,

Yes, Andrea's right, I find having someone around that is an understanding nonOCDer helps in these situations. You don't need them for reassurance, but a little encouragement goes a long way Even without OCD it's easier to do this sort of things with someone else.

My OCD is really bad and when my mother died last year I must admit it was hell packing up her place. But that was as I'd just had a breakdown and not only did I have a limited time to do it the family kept interfering and confusing me. On the days that I had someone helping constructively I was able to do it.

Use it as an opportunity to go through everything in the house and throw it or take it to a charity shop if you really don't need it. Give yourself plenty of time to pack etc. I had to do it in a hurry and as a result didn't know where anything was and brought back to my flat loads of things that should have been thrown. So plan ahead and label all the boxes, everyone kept taking my labels off

Although I hate it back in my flat if I hadn't come back to it I probably wouldn't have met you all as my mother wouldn't allow me to have the internet. I'd love a fresh start in a new place, I wouldn't then have all the bad memories that help to trigger the OCD

Just think of all the fun you can have creating a new little sanctuary.

Planning and pacing yourself is the key to not getting too stressed with a move and try and get someone to help. It's so much easier as you don't get distracted and it's also much easier to make the decision to throw something away rather than keep it for keeping it's sake.
We're all here to support you.

All the best

Trudy

Fri Feb 19 2010 14:41:10 #
nettlenoo
Member

thanks ladies ive view it today and i really liked it, the place had a stunning view. i doubt ill be online for a while for the services to switch over so i hope you all stay safe and well thanks once again for all your support speak soon love annette

Sat Feb 20 2010 0:01:12 #
nettlenoo
Member

thanks ladies ive view it today and i really liked it, the place had a stunning view. i doubt ill be online for a while for the services to switch over so i hope you all stay safe and well thanks once again for all your support speak soon love annette

Sat Feb 20 2010 0:01:12 #
Truddles
Member

Hi netti,

I wish you luck with the move and hope that you'll be happy in your new home. Remember just pace yourself and you'll be ok.

Please keep in touch until the move and then let us know that you are ok.

Trudy

Sat Feb 20 2010 13:19:36 #
nettlenoo
Member

hi well ive had the phone cut off all ready silly talk talk and week too soon and im not really supposed to have the internet as its with the phone as a package but for some strange reason the internet works yah :-). ive turned current flat upside down and boxes galore every where lol but ive enlisted peoples help so all is good. hers to monday and getting this move started.

Sat Feb 20 2010 15:33:36 #