OCD Action

swan
Member

Hi,
As i find it harder to get out im finding that i'm losing friends. This is making me really depressed. As i work people dont understand why i find it hard to get out but all my energies go into work, feel really really low.

Sun Apr 17 2011 10:51:23 #
Ratwomble
Member

Dear swan

I think one of the ways that OCD isolates us is that it makes it difficult for us to socialise through worry about what we mig do or say and in putting ourselves into situations where we may trigger an obsession.

I found that my friends fell into three camps

1. Those I told, who understood and helped
2. Those I told, who didn't understand and drifted off
3. Those I chose not to tell, for whatever reason.

I would say that my friends split fairly evenly between 1 and 3. There were very few 2s

I now am not hesitant about telling close family and friends about my OCD, but it is something I share sparingly with casual acquaintances. Partly this is to avoid putting them in an embarrassing position, and partly to avoid having to explain.

I don't have many friends, but those I do are all living away from here. I have two in London, one in Grantham, one in Aberdeen, one in Austria and one in new Zealand. The family joke is that my really close friends will go a long way away to get away from me, but I don't think that's true.

Email and texting are the saviours. I keep in regular contact with them through electronic means and in a way that helps me because I've never been brilliant at the pub socialising thing.

Fighting OCD and depression is a full time work out. It is no wonder that you are tired. People won't necessarily understand that. People are also scared of it. So if you are managing to work, don't beat yourself up about not going to the pub or partying. If you feel you are allowing friends to drift away, then use Facebook and email to stay in touch. You won't be this low forever.

And we are all your friends here!

David

Sun Apr 17 2011 11:41:27 #
swan
Member

Thankyou for your encouragement some of my close friends or those i thought were close have stopped texting if i say im alright they tell me that they know im not so if i open up the contact stops ive stopped texting and emailing due to lack of replies.
Thanks again for your encouragement.

Sun Apr 17 2011 16:02:44 #
Truddles
Member

Hi

Sorry that you're having problems with friends. I've had similar problems in the past with friends and it doesn't help the OCD does it?

Sun Apr 17 2011 16:04:44 #
blueboy
Member

swan,
i never really did have good friends... any i tried to make... were indifferent to me..
i keep trying though..
well more or less i let them try with me now...if i come across any people..
hope you are feeling a little better, i certainly appreciate your support in the past...PAUL.

Sun Apr 17 2011 16:29:25 #
swan
Member

Hi,
Thankyou for your replies and encouragement it helps knowing Im not on my ownxx

Mon Apr 18 2011 14:49:09 #
nettlenoo
Member

hello swan this is so tough i know ive pushed away so many friends because ive felt they have hurt me and its easy to not have them as friends then let them hurt me. i can say from this i can be very lonely at times. i have one close friend who knows most things apart from the thoughts, but my other close friends i would never dream of telling. for me i think people just dont understand or even try too. plus i also get annoyed when people say its never too late to change which maybe true but when you feel your life is on repeat its not what you want to hear. yes i want to try to be more social but when you struggle just to go out side by yourself that can be very hard. i think for you and me and anyone else in the same boat it will happen when your ready and people who are genuine friends will stick around. dont beat yourself up too much hun you can chat on here any time pm me if you want. reading is also very good and fills time.
best wishes
nettle

Mon Apr 18 2011 20:26:42 #
swan
Member

netlenoo thankyou

Wed Apr 20 2011 0:50:32 #