OCD Action

goolie
Member

Hi Guys

Can anyone relate to or help me with this.

I have Harm and Relationship OCD and wish to have a baby. Am going in for an op on Thursday to unblock my fallopian tubes (am terrified of the sedation they give you, hate feeling out of control).

I am just starting to come off my meds as I have researeched and they can cause breathing problems in the baby and I dont want that.

I despeartely want a baby but my brain is telling maybe I shouldnt as I wont be able to cope and my OCD will get worse and that I will get post natal depression and cause harm to my baby or just crack up.

It is so heartbreaking, I want it so much but am also so scared of the consiquinces (loosing the plot).

I cant let this bloody OCD ruin my life.

Has anyone else had this?

Sun Aug 16 2009 10:56:28 #
frazzledmom
Member

Hi goolie,

I went through the same thing when I wanted to have children, I was deathly afraid of hurting my children you have to remember it's just the OCD and I never admitted it to anyone fearing that they would think I was crazy , after having my children I had a little bit of the baby blues that every woman gets, but when they were first born I never had harmful thoughts towards them, but I was always having thoughts that I would wake up and they had died through the night or any scenario possible, what I did do and still do is constant checking on my children I even wake up through the night to check to see if they are breathing, I put my hand on there backs and my ear to their noses to make sure they are still breathing.It's like clock work at night if I don't check I don't sleep. As my kids got older I have had some harmful thoughts especially when they are misbehaving and I'm really stressed, have I ever acted on them absolutely not and you won't either. As for going in for surgery and sedation I feel the same way the thought of losing control really freaks me out, I always have to be in control of my surroundings and myself.
frazzledmom

Sun Aug 16 2009 13:25:42 #
goolie
Member

Thank you so much for your reply. I have been looking on loads of sites and this is my first helpful piece of information I have found.

Were you on meds before or during you pregnancy. Did you have counselling before and after your pregnancy?

I can definately understand the checking to see if they are still breathing I have thoughts about that too so I know I am gonna be the same. I feel for you. How old are your children now

Sun Aug 16 2009 17:12:54 #
Moocher
Member

How does your partner feel about the situation? Do you feel that your partner is supportive enough to be able to get you through if you did experience problems with your OCD during pregnancy or after the birth?

Mon Aug 17 2009 8:26:05 #
frazzledmom
Member

Hi goolie
The answer to your questions I have 3 children 10,8,2 I did not take any meds, just therapy and a very supportive husband. Although sometimes I did feel I need meds I didn't take any, on hind sight I probably would have enjoyed my childrens younger years more, instead of being filled with complete panic all the time, so if it is getting to the point were there is to much worry and panic that you can't fully enjoy the formative years with your children I would recommend it, because there is always that regret of missing the firsts, also I had missed all of the signs of my daughters OCD because I was preoccupied with my own, I feel the guilt any mother would but more so that she had been going through her own inner turmoil and I had missed it.
Frazzledmom

Fri Aug 21 2009 0:35:26 #