Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)Or would you say it doesnt make any difference at all?
Im not sure if i should let people know because it can be a bit embarrassing, but i guess it might make sense to tell people if they might notice any of it.
But overall do you think it helps with treating ocd if you tell more people about it?
Hi,
I personally think it helps to tell people about my OCD as I get support from them when I need it. I suffer from intrusive thoughts as well as cleaning/ordering but have only told close friends about the type of thoughts I get.
I think it is a personal thing and I know of some people that have told others about their OCD and been unsupported as a result and not understood.
So yes overall I think it is good to tell others as it will raise awareness.
Bridget
Hello heppty, welcome to the forum,
It's a very difficult question and I suppose the only honest (but probably unsatisfactory) answer is that it depends on the person. I was very glad when I finally told my children what was going on (aged 11 and 14) and that helped them. I was open with close friends and family. I had to tell my boss and hr at work, since I was off for nine months.
But I didn't really tell my colleagues and they didn't ask when I got back.
I suppose the one time it really helped was when we ended up travelling abroad whilst I was really I'll. We were visiting friends in Austria and I couldn't go to their house, or certain restaurants and was generally just being odd. So I was very open with them and it helped.
So it depends on the person. Having said that, I have never told anyone and have it make things worse. Maybe I should tell more people!
David
Hi everyone
There was a thread about this a while back and it's a very tricky question because once you tell someone you can never untell them. I think the answer is to proceed with extreme caution and remember you are in control, you choose who you tell and who you don't tell.
Telling close family members is one thing and in most circumstances to everyone's benefit, telling casual friends and work colleagues is a different matter.
Last year for OCD Week I organised a local OCD Awareness event and "came out" in an interview on Radio Cornwall and it has been an eye opener because of the different and unexpected reactions from various people. My solicitor revealed that his wife has OCD and asked for literature, a man who I had only ever had contact with in a professional - client relationship suddenly opened up human emotions, yet my close neighbours have never ever mentioned it but just treat me as though it never happened. Complete strangers came out of the woodwork wanting to talk about their own problems, yet others who I had regarded as friends became judgemental and showed total lack of understanding and empathy.
So I agree with David, know the person you are thinking of telling and ask yourself if you know them well enough to trust them with such a sensitive matter.
Unregistered
I am very wary of doing this, but got into trouble for voicing my opinion see link below:
http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/tell-two-people#post-49752
We're all individuals (wouldn't it be boring if we were all the same?)and so each need to decide for ourselves whether we feel comfortable telling others about our OCD. For some of us it's part of our OCD the fear of telling others and the reaction that we might get, for others it's having the confidence to confide in others. But for all of us we have to gauge as to who it's appropriate to tell, after all it doesn't help our OCD if we get a bad reaction because of the ignorance of others.
Personally I'd rather people knew why I was behaving the way that I was rather than them thinking that I was a complete and utter nutter (that subject can be debated at a later date 
) so I started by telling complete strangers that I encountered such as shop assistants that I had OCD and what it was in the safe knowledge that if I did get a bad reaction I wouldn't be seeing them again so it didn't matter. But on the whole the reaction that I got was good.Family and friends were more difficult as many of them reacted badly once again because of sheer ignorance. Having said that the health professionals can be just as ignorant about OCD even those claiming to deal with OCD 
None of us should be afraid to voice our opinions on this forum, and we certainly shouldn't slated when we post about our personal experiences.
Unregistered
Trudy, I'm in a rush - will come back to this. But, just want to say, the one person who might have had reason to feel upset with me over that thread was you. I know you weren't, but I was reluctant to hurt you by voicing my opinion. I didn't mean to appear negative (I was just stating how I had been treated) and I know you didn't view it like that. I also agree with you about telling shop assistants etc… I’m all for raising awareness, but not always from a more personal perspective.
hi heppty,
i have never found it easy telling people about my OCD, for me it has always been a taboo subject, people are not always as kind as we would like them to be, it is a very private illness because people who have not suffered it dont understand the impact it has on us.
i have been suffering with severe OCD for over 50 yrs but i am very very careful who i trust with my secret illness, the illness is far too complex for non sufferers to understand.
Love Brennie x
Tricia,
I read the thread you gave the link to where you say you got into trouble for voicing your opinion. How can you say that? You gave your opinion and someone else gave theirs. The opinions were different but it seems to me that you did not like someone having a different opinion to yours and took exception to it. This is a forum after all where we can all give and share our opinions - and discuss the differences.
Having said that and to get back on track, we are all different, have different feelings and levels of confidence and have different circumsatnces so what may be good for one may not be good for another and what may work well for one may not work for another. Where many of us tend to go wrong is to assume that what works for one will, and must work for another. Advice is always worth listening to but at the end of the day the listener has to decide if it is the right thing for their individual circumstances. I wonder if you can relate to that.
Kinds regards,
Mems
I think this debate and the strong feelings it has brought out illustrates that the original question "Do you think it's easier telling people about OCD" does not have a simple straightforward answer and tells us that revealing our OCD to others can be beneficial in some circumstances and detrimental in others. But the good news is that as public knowledge and awareness of OCD increases the detrimental effects should reduce.
Unregistered
Dear Mems, I wonder why I am so badly misunderstood here. I feel I must speak a different language from some of you. I have never in my life had a problem with others disagreeing with me. In fact, I am keen to listen to all points of view and sometimes I find myself coming round to the other person’s way of thinking!
What I do have an issue over is personal attacks. On the thread I was referring to I was told I was negative, the kind of person who is determined not to let things get better, that I expect the whole world to accommodate me…The implication was that I have done nothing to tackle my OCD and that is why the people I confided in deserted me. This is not only totally untrue but it is extremely hurtful. It was most definitely not just a case of different points of view!!
I won’t bother with the rest, I truly don’t wish to drag it up again.
All I was attempting to do was give an account of the reactions of some people after I had confided in them. That was all. If the reaction was negative, I’m afraid that was not of my doing. Perhaps I should always distort the facts and say everyone I’ve told handled it wonderfully. Also, everyone I know with OCD is cured… this in actual fact is a great condition to have. It's merely a test of our strength and willpower.
Tess i couldnt have put it better myself. I totally agree with your post. Telling others may sometimes as you say be beneficial in some circumstances but detrimental in others. My personal point of view comes down to basically who i feel i can trust in my life (which unfortunately for me is not many) with such delicate and personal information about myself.
I have a really big fear of if i tell someone will it make them look at me in a different light and even if they dont and still treat me the same i will always be thinking "are they saying what they are really thinking" again that comes down to my ocd i realise that but it doesnt help in my decision on who to tell. We have recently moved near my husbands family and before when we were a fair distance away it was easy to keep my ocd a secret. Now though it is getting more and more difficult as we are spending more and more time with them. I think my sister in law thought me very odd the other week as she was quite keen to have a night out with me but as i explained to her i dont go far without my husband these days and i left it at that. I still wonder whether i should have told her the whole story or not.
I am probably in a minority with this one but i havent even told my parents about the ocd and i have been suffering for fourteen years but we are not close so to me its just the same as not telling them about a lot of things that go on in my life.
Take care all and sorry for the long post. I got a bit carried away there.
Tizzkins
Unregistered
P.S. Mems, your reference to several members being negative, pessimistic and selfish was also a personal attack and not merely a difference of opinion. There’s quite a difference between having another opinion and being offensive and personal. On that occasion, your criticism was directed at a few of us who believe subjecting young children to media attention via a documentary could have harmful repercussions.
I am sorry Tricia, you are out of order here.
1. Nowhere in this thread did I refer to several members nor have I made "several references" that you refer to. I have made only one posting (other than this reply) on this thread.
2. It was not a personal attack, nor was it selfish. I simply gave my view.
3. I have not been offensive or personal although I do have a different opinion to you. That cannot be decribed as either personal or offensive.
4. Who were the "few of us" you mention? I never mentioned any forum members by name or action.
All I said was that I don't agree that you got into trouble for expressing your opinion. What I said was that I thought you did not like someone having a different opinion to you.
There is no way that this could be considered to be a personal attack on you or any other forum member.
If I have an opinion which is different to yours (and it is) then I have the right to express that opinion and discuss it on the forum.
The only reason I have replied to this publicly on the forum is because you chose to make a public personal attack on me for not agreeing with your views. You could have reported me to the moderators if you felt that I had breached the rules, which I clearly haven't, so why didn't you? Is it because you have a number of supporters on the forum including at least one moderator?
Mems
hello i am new to this forum and i have never been diagnosed with ocd but i have a problem with contamination and causing harm to others. i always feel a overwhelming responsibility to other people. i have tried to post before but am very nervous. i am trying to say that i try to tell people how i feel but they don't take seriously and just say oh you clean a lot but its not like that
Hi wiggy, try not to be nervous in posting on this forum. There are alot of people on here that are very friendly and will make you feel at ease, so welcome to the forum.
You say that you have not been diagnosed with OCD, have you ever discussed this with someone that could help you, say your GP, or maybe at first confide in a good family member that would support you.
Once diagnosed, there is help out there. ( It is far more than just cleaning alot and some people will not understand, but some people will). It also depends on how much it affects your everyday life and depending on how long you have felt this way and carried out cleaning behaviours and whether or not how this has changed over time. I hope this has been of some help to you, you are not alone.
Take care K xxx.
Hi wiggy,
Welcome to the forum. *k is right, you shouldn't be nervous about posting here. I am fairly new but found that reading other people's posts gave me a lot of strength and when I joined in it became even better.
I'm interested that you mention "causing harm to others". I am currently in recovery, but when I was very ill last year one of my major problems was concern about causing harm to others through not clearing rubbish off the roads.. It started fairly innocently - I would always stop and remove large dangerous objects from the road, but just before the OCD overwhelmed me, I was down to crisp packets and twigs! I was taking enormous risks on busy roads, and injured myself a couple of times. My journey home from work went from 15 minutes to about 45.
(if you want more discussion on this then pm me, I don't want to bore people on this thread! Most of them know my story by now!)
For me the turning point was being diagnosed as having OCD and being treated for it. Once that happened I realised that I had had OCD for a very long time. Seems obvious now, but for some reason never realised before.
Anyway, welcome to the forum, sorry to hijack the thread
Best wishes
David
Firstly a big welcome to Wiggy. You have been very brave - and sensible - by taking the first step to try to help yourself, coming onto this forum and confiding that you think you may have OCD. I too have contamination OCD and my life used to be totally dominated by hand washing and cleaning but I am now very much better than I used to be and for the overwhelming majority of sufferers life will improve with correct treatment. Of course you are nervous, everyone is nervous when they start to recognise their OCD and confront it but you will find the members of this forum all understand. It may help you to have a good look round this website because it will give you an excellent unbiased overview of OCD and the various treatments which are available. You can also use the Forum Topic Search facility near the top right hand side of the screen to look for past threads which are relevant to your own problems and also to find details of self help material.
Tess
A few months back we did an experiment in our OCD support group - we started with a positive personal comment, something like "you're looking nice today" and each member said how it made them feel - and just about everyone made a negative interpretation such as "I obviously don't usually look nice", " I obviously never look nice", "why are they saying this? something must be wrong with my appearance", "what do they want from me?", "they're lying".
OCD does this to us and in my opinion the negative way it makes us think is responsible for the forum arguments and the heartache they invariably cause to those caught up in them.
And how are the onlookers supposed to deal with this - change the subject and pretend it hasn't happened?, attempt a mediatory post?, come out in support of one side or the other? and then get dragged in too.
The fact is that we are all entitled to our own opinions and to express them on this forum, that is healthy. But these forum exchanges which degenerate from posts which are interpreted as personal attacks into public verbal slanging matches of self justification are not good for anyone - except for OCD of course because OCD has to be right.
Unregistered
Dear Mems, Perhaps if you had actually taken more time to read my messages you would not have made some of the statements you have. I did NOT call you selfish, I was saying that you have called me and others selfish! I was trying to give an example of the difference between a personal attack and merely having another opinion. The former is unacceptable the latter is fine.
I notice you have chosen to ignore the facts I presented, where I was judged and criticized unfairly, by someone who knows nothing of my circumstances. It had absolutely nothing to do with a difference of opinion. Why can you not see that?!
As Kay has obviously observed, my reference to your personal attack, on several of us, was referring to this thread: http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/are-you-a-parent-with-diagnosed-ocd
On the thread, you obviously had every right to disagree with those of us who are opposed to placing young children before the media. You could have expressed a different view. That would have been fine! Instead you labelled several of us as negative, pessimistic and selfish etc. There was no need for that!
So, to your number 1. Please refer to link above, this will clarify that point.
2. You made a personal attack on that thread. No-one, as far as I am aware, has called you selfish. As I have tried to explain, it was how you referred to a group of us.
3 and 4 are also covered by the content of that thread.
I appreciate that you believe your child’s life has been destroyed by someone with OCD. Perhaps if you were prepared to discuss issues rather than decry us personally, we might be able to have a meaningful discussion.
I have never made a personal attack on you. I have defended myself, Tess , Kay and others, whom you labelled selfish etc. I did not make a counter-attack. Please, at least read the messages carefully and get your facts right.
I have never reported anyone on this forum, and I am certainly not going to lower myself to do so now. I believe in freedom of speech, even though it can invite personal attacks etc.
Unregistered
Tess, I actually accept that I am supposed to roll over and take any attacks directed at me. I have always been quick to leap to the defence of others when they are wronged, but obviously I should keep quiet when unjust, and untrue, remarks are directed at me. Most of my life I turned the other cheek, so to speak. I've been encouraged by a psychologist to do this no more. I'm really not sure this advice was wise. Perhaps it really is time for me to bow out altogether.
Tricia, no no no you dont have to accept any attacks from anyone.
You are always here to help and encourage everyone on this forum ( which you have been doing for many years ).
Please dont bow out...why should you? you have said nothing wrong!!
This forum would not be the same without you.
Love Brennie x
In the eighteen months I have been on this forum I have seen a number of lovely members leave because of unpleasantness and as Liz has pointed out on another thread we have enough to deal with with our OCD and arguments on the forum are depressing and stressful when we come here for support or to try to help others.
I have twice posted on this thread (above) in an attempt to calm emotions without success so I will now accept defeat and take no further part in this matter other than to say this is a public forum and it is not the right place for personal disputes.
hello again. i want to say thankyou to you all for making me feel welcome. yet again i struggling to post been trying all day.i am now thinking too myself what i don't have ocd and i shouldn't be on here. i suppose i can only say what i go through on a day to day basis. my worries seem to change. one of my worries and it was here i knew something was wrong was that i was really scared of scissors and knives. i had to check my handbag and pockets before leaving the house Coz i was scared i could harm someone. i obviously don't want to i just think what if i have and don't remember. previous to that i was convinced i had aids. i even went to docs but they wouldn't even do a test but i was convinced. this went on for a couple of years and went away.when i am at work i get upset a lot Coz i struggle with certain jobs. we have a coffee machine which has to cleaned with chemicals and filled up. i can't in near it Coz i think that i will put something in the milk and poisen people or cleaning fluid in wrong tube
i was lucky in my work up until a couple of months ago Coz my boss was also my friend.she was my friend first. she really tried her best to help me. she noticed at work that i was emptying the bins to check them. i keep thinking i have put a baby in there. i would even get other people to check but i would pretend i lost my dropped my pen or lost money it there. in my mind i knew if they looked in there too they would see anything in there that shouldn't be there. im sorry too go on and on. i just feel that its only right that i should tell you as much as i can. i think i read another thread bout tourettes syndrome which my brother has
Wiggy,
First,y I'm not a doctor (I am a computer programmer) but I have lived with OCD for long enough to say that from what you describe it certainly sounds like OCD.
I would urge you to go and see your doctor as soon as you can and discuss treatment options. There are people on this forum who have exactly your symptoms and may be able to help. They may miss your posts because they are in this thread.
PLEASE start another thread just saying a little about your symptoms so that the others are more likely to see it.
But please go and see your doctor!
Bst wishes
David
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