http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/tags/intrusive-thoughts It's Time to Act. OCD Action provides support and information for people affected by Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Fri, 10 Feb 2012 21:06:53 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/search.php http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/struggling-these-last-couple-of-days#post-64340 Fri, 10 Feb 2012 20:48:43 +0000 citaloman 64340@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Message me if you want Slog. </p> <p>Treat yourself to something nice. </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/struggling-these-last-couple-of-days#post-64335 Fri, 10 Feb 2012 13:30:43 +0000 slogsweep 64335@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Thanks BT, I'll try, and I'll be back in a bit. </p> <p>The number of times the IT's make me want to quit too &lt;img src=&quot;http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_sad.gif&quot; title=&quot;:(&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; .</p> <p>Thanks again for your help I really needed some words of support,<br /> Slog </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/struggling-these-last-couple-of-days#post-64334 Fri, 10 Feb 2012 13:10:52 +0000 bethany 64334@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>I’m OK, Slog. I’ve had the same obsession for years. I work in a school and some days I am OK and at other times the intrusive thoughts make me want to quit.</p> <p>The reason it’s regarded as therapy is because, for many, they become desensitised by what they read/hear. I’ve yet to experience this effect and I have attempted reading such material, listening to loop tapes of what I fear I might do to a child etc. Nothing like that worked (though I know it does for many). The only things for me were medication, exercise and keeping my mind as busy as possible. Oh, and diet, which I do lapse over now and again. The right nutrients do seem to help and when we are depressed it’s all too easy not to eat properly.</p> <p>Go to town if you can, Slog! </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/struggling-these-last-couple-of-days#post-64333 Fri, 10 Feb 2012 13:04:19 +0000 slogsweep 64333@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>A little, in that I've stopped crying. I think I'll have a bit of breakfast in a bit. How on earth would reading such a thing be therapy? I was doing so well until reading that. </p> <p>Thank you for replying to me when I'm like this. I might also suggest a wander into town for the walk but I'm scared I'll end up buying things compulsively &lt;img src=&quot;http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_sad.gif&quot; title=&quot;:(&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> <p>I really hope spring turns up soon, how are you getting on?</p> <p>Slog </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/struggling-these-last-couple-of-days#post-64332 Fri, 10 Feb 2012 13:02:49 +0000 bethany 64332@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>P.S. Not suggesting you did read it as a form of therapy! </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/struggling-these-last-couple-of-days#post-64331 Fri, 10 Feb 2012 13:01:13 +0000 bethany 64331@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>I think so, Slog, the cold really seems to be getting to many of us. </p> <p>I know there are those who advocate reading articles like that as a form of therapy, but it certainly never worked for me. Your reaction of being repulsed is such a clear sign that you are not what OCD tells you. Try now to focus on other things if you can. Do you feel any better than when you wrote your first message? </p> <p>Are you able to do any exercise to try to warm up? It also helps my intrusive thoughts. Looks as if this freeze will end by early next week. Spring will soon be here, Slog! </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/struggling-these-last-couple-of-days#post-64330 Fri, 10 Feb 2012 12:55:11 +0000 slogsweep 64330@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>It was an article about a pervert being sent to prison 30 years after commiting an offence over a period of time starting when he was about 14. I don't know what came over me but I had a total panic attack. I was repulsed by his crimes but then the OCD takes over. </p> <p>Thanks for replying, so being constantly cold would take it's toll?</p> <p>Slog </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/struggling-these-last-couple-of-days#post-64325 Fri, 10 Feb 2012 12:11:49 +0000 bethany 64325@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Sorry to hear this, Slog. It is a terrible time of year and I think so many of us are cold and depressed. With that the OCD worsens. I don’t say that meaning ‘just get on with it, we’re all in the same boat’, but to empathise and stress you are not alone. Can you write about the article, it might help. </p> <p>Don’t even consider stopping your medication, it may be helping or the CBT. Not sure whether you were saying one doesn’t seem to be helping or both. </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/struggling-these-last-couple-of-days#post-64324 Fri, 10 Feb 2012 11:52:27 +0000 slogsweep 64324@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hello everyone, </p> <p>Firstly I'm sorry I haven't been on as much as I normally am, been strangely busy with work and our broadband's not the best. I'm having a rotten couple of days and I'm scared of it turning into a relapse rather than a setback. I read a horrible story in the paper and it's really shaken me and I've been spiking all over the place since early yesterday afternoon. It's as if all the progress I've made has been wiped out. </p> <p>I cried my eyes out this morning thinking "how can I get a job like this?" "how can I have a family with this condition" "what if my kids suffer like me, terrified every day of their miserable lives?", "how can I support my girlfriend (who's going through hell also) if I can't be certain I can support myself". Etcetc. </p> <p>I've lost my appetite again too and have been struggling to get up. I've felt the depression building up the last few days. Our house is desperately cold and I've little to motivate me at university. Then wham, that article and I'm back on the floor. I don't know what to do and I'm really gutted. My next CBT session is Tuesday afternoon and I am still taking my meds, though I doubt whether there's much point if I'm still capable of feeling like this. </p> <p>Slog &lt;img src=&quot;http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_sad.gif&quot; title=&quot;:(&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63872 Thu, 26 Jan 2012 16:41:13 +0000 Cuthbert ffoliott 63872@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hiya Dontwannabenamed -</p> <p>and a heartfelt welcome from me too. You will find that there's a lot on offer at this site, and also that there are people with the same kind of thoughts that are such a burden to you.</p> <p>You really wrote a fine opening post, it is lucid and clear; despite the content it's a pleasure to read it. I am convinced that, should you see an expert (e.g. a psychologist or psychiatrist; referred to by a G.P.), you will be very well able to explain in detail what you experience.</p> <p>OCD has a lot to do with guilt. Often, guilt is the rather amorphous starting point for our obsessions and compulsions, it is the soil out of which specific fears and anxieties grow. The fears are related to particular situations and things; they are defined. In your case they are linked to religion, and the devil. </p> <p>As you saw, you're not alone in this, and you found some relief in this knowledge. That's a good thing. Moreover, you'll eventually find ways of dealing with it all. I am convinced of that. And it is to your advantage that you're a young person, and that you found the courage to be open about it at your age. Young folks are flexible in learning strategies to cope. Also, at your age issues that are related to one's psychological state 'hit harder and more directly' than they do later on in life. For instance, persons in puberty and early adolescence often experience feelings of depersonalisation, and get scared because of that. And in most cases, these feelings simply wane, wear off over time. </p> <p>So, I guess with good help and with maintaining the attitude that you show here and now, I think you've got a bright future ahead of you. Do keep us informed, will you? In the open forums, or via PM - messages about how it all develops are welcome!</p> <p>Best, Cuthbert in rainy Holland. </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63866 Thu, 26 Jan 2012 15:48:42 +0000 nepnek 63866@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hi Dontwannabenamed<br /> I have had problems with OCD for many years and part of my OCD involves religion and God. I was brought up in a christian home but developed an obsession with hell and being bad. My OCD as a child revolved around this and has remained in some form of another throughout my life. It has taken me many years to come to terms with my thinking as I have struggled to get help and even a diagnosis. The good news is that you know these thoughts are unwanted and intrusive and in knowing that alone they loose some of their power. Speaking to your GP is a good place to start and depending on what you find out you will be able to get some help with these thoughts. I wish you all the best and welcome to the forum. </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63820 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 20:01:14 +0000 aishah 63820@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hi Dontwannabenamed,</p> <p>I am a sufferer of intrusive thoughts too and know how distressing and real they may seem at the time of getting them. You are doing the right thing in accepting them and letting them come and go as this should lessen the amount of time they bother you in the long run.</p> <p>I have suffered a wide range of thoughts over time, including religious ones too but have learnt to live with them for the majority of time.</p> <p>It would be a good idea to visit your G.P. for a diagnosis (if neccessary) then some professional should follow.</p> <p>Welcome to the forum by the way.</p> <p>Bridget &lt;img src=&quot;http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_lol.gif&quot; title=&quot;:lol:&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63630 Sat, 21 Jan 2012 14:59:28 +0000 Truddles 63630@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Have a look at this thread <a href="http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/the-ocd-action-forums-101-tips-for-people-with-ocd-guide">The OCD Action Forum's 101 tips for people with OCD guide</a> It will give you some useful tips for managing your OCD especially whilst you're waiting to access professional treatment. It has been written by people with OCD based on their own experiences of dealing with OCD. </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63628 Sat, 21 Jan 2012 13:36:37 +0000 alwayswearingflorals 63628@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>I can so relate to this! I could be fine, then I hear a song/see something on telly that reminds me of something/someone negative from the past (school bullies etc) and it bothers me for a couple of days that theyre going to "get me" (I know how chilish that sounds, sorry) I've been really bad today and have been baking like a madwoman trying to focus on something else.</p> <p>I hope that post doesnt sound all selfcentred, just wanted you to know that you're not alone in your thoughts - this forum has been great for me in that I've realised I'm not alone in the things I torture myself about. </p> <p>Hope you're feeling a bit better. </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63625 Sat, 21 Jan 2012 11:26:28 +0000 slogsweep 63625@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hello yes please see your doctor right away! It's the vital first step to treating this horrible disorder. There's a cribsheet somewhere on OCD Action that you can take to your GP just in case he or she doesn't encounter the condition too often. </p> <p>You'll probably be put on SSRI medication. Don't despair, these tablets may not appear to do anything at first but eventually their effects are life changing. These are the stabilisers that will eventually be taken off after you reach a better place and can effectively undergo CBT or have improved so much on your own that you feel no further treatment is needed. </p> <p>Also don't be afraid to use this resource, it's a gold mine if you have OCD, </p> <p>Best wishes</p> <p>Slog </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63616 Sat, 21 Jan 2012 08:57:44 +0000 Truddles 63616@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hi Dontwannabenamed,</p> <p>Welcome to the forum from me too &lt;img src=&quot;http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_biggrin.gif&quot; title=&quot;:D&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> <p>Nimrod's correct you need to see your doctor in order to move forward.</p> <p>You can get a lot of support from others on this forum as you can see by the replies that you've had. Help from those who are going through similar to you can be invaluable.</p> <p>Have a good look around the OCD Action website paying particular attention to the <a href="http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/support-info/resources/">Resource Centre</a> there you will find a wealth of information on OCD including a card that you can download to take to the GP, this outlines some of the key things that they need to know about OCD.</p> <p>Have you read any books on OCD? If not I suggest that you read:<br /> <strong>Breaking Free from OCD: A CBT guide for young people and their families</strong> by Jo Derisley</p> <p>It’s called a CBT Guide for Young People and Their Families and is aimed at younger people and their parents or carers. It’s well presented and is by no means boring and explains things simply but in depth and contains plenty of work sheets for you to work through. It explains CBT and how to do it and is a lot better than some of the books for adults.</p> <p>At the end of each chapter there is information for the parent or carer giving them advice on how to help the young person with OCD. This book might help your mum to understand what you’re going through and more importantly how she can work with you to help you overcome this.</p> <p>Mike's post gives a good explanation of the intrusive thoughts and how we all have to learn to live with uncertainty.</p> <p>Trudy </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63614 Fri, 20 Jan 2012 21:37:09 +0000 Mike 63614@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>A couple important points:</p> <p>1) Studies have shown that the thought content of people with OCD is not different than people without OCD. In other words, people with OCD don't have thoughts that people without OCD don't have. What IS different in people with OCD is how they react to the thoughts. Your doubts about whether or not you should be thinking about the devil, and whether or not there is something wrong with you, is OCD land, because most people wouldn't question themselves on such a fundamental level even if they had the same thoughts you had.</p> <p>2) You say that you know nothing is wrong with you "deep down", but it still scares you. This is where the uncertainty aspect of OCD comes into play. OCD is a disease of being unable to cope with uncertainty. OCD makes us feel so anxious about things that we feel the need to prove 100% (i.e., have certainty) that our fears are not true, or will not come true. This is the purpose of the compulsions. However, it is not possible to prove most things 100%, so compulsions are a futile exercise and only feed the OCD. The best treatment for OCD is CBT therapy, in which the patient learns how to live with and accept uncertainty. Uncertainty is a part of life, and we have no choice but to live with it. In your particular case, CBT would help you cope with the uncertainty of whether or not something is really wrong with you. It will teach you to only worry about things if there is evidence that they are true, NOT to worry about them just because they're POSSIBLE (because ANYTHING is possible!!!)</p> <p>Mike </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63550 Thu, 19 Jan 2012 19:56:58 +0000 wannabefree 63550@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hi again, that's the beauty of these forums, I've met some wonderful people on here. We all come from different places, but yet we have a shared understanding of this demon OCD. But by goodness we are getting there, wherever there is of course. Thank you to you all for sharing, cos without the sharing we wouldn't have the support that I dearly cherish. &lt;img src=&quot;http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif&quot; title=&quot;:-)&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; <br /> Wannabe </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63525 Thu, 19 Jan 2012 07:59:49 +0000 dontwannabenamed 63525@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Thank you everyone for your advice and I have to say I feel slightly better now and more at ease. I guess its a little difficult for me to accept the thoughts for what they are but I will keep trying. I think that my mind thinks in a way such that whenever a thought comes to mind, it is equivalent to me doing the action, which I know sounds stupid though it leaves me with a lot of guilt. Anyway, thanks for the advice everyone! </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63518 Wed, 18 Jan 2012 23:42:49 +0000 rich 63518@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hi there,</p> <p>The intrusive thoughts you describe have affected me for over ten years now. I first started to get them at about 19 years of age. I like you was very worried and wondered what they meant. To put you at ease, I sought professional help and managed to gain control of this problem. My therapist conveyed the following to me which helped dispel my worries about these unpleasant thoughts :-</p> <p>The average human being has between 40,000 and 60,000 thoughts a day and inevitably some of these will be bizarre or unpleasant. The difference between sufferes of OCD and non sufferers is that those with OCD errornously interpret these thoughts as meaningful and worry whether they are mad or bad. Non sufferers simply dismiss these thoughts and so they fade into insignificance while we worry about them and they become obsessions. The trick is not to try and control the thoughts by preventing them but too appraise them in a more rational manner thus reducing the frequency and intensity of the obsessive thoughts. If you are refered to a psychotherapist by your GP you will practice this kind of thing.</p> <p>Hope this helps ! </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63447 Tue, 17 Jan 2012 16:55:31 +0000 slogsweep 63447@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Upon recollection, which is something I try not to do but for once may end up being helpful to someone, I can remember having urges to yawn, shout bad language or make funny noises in the middle of prayers in school. I thought at the time it was just an atheistic streak but surely my religious beliefs wouldn't make me do something that stupid? </p> <p>I don't know, this OCD. The more I think about it the more I'm realising how deeply it's infected my brain. </p> <p>Anyway, hopefully my experiences there firstly don't offend you and secondly show you just how common ROCD is, I used to question religion and rebel against it at an early age, then when bad things happened I'd think I was being punished. Sorry I couldn't think of this before. Like other OCD phases this one just died out over time. </p> <p>Best wishes,<br /> Slog </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63445 Tue, 17 Jan 2012 16:41:34 +0000 geronimos 63445@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hi Dontwannabenamed,<br /> I'm new here too.<br /> Just to let You know,Ive had ocd for most of my life without knowing at first what on earth was occuring.(The total opposite of what You wish!)<br /> When I was 17-18 I was part of a strict christian religion. And when I'd pray I would get swear words of the worst type,,concerning God and Jesus. So I would have to start the prayer again and again until it was perfect...So stressfull ! Ocd always picks what will annoy you the most at the worst time! Remember its not real,,,It happens automatically,,Its not the real you! Theres lots of help on here,,, Regards Wolfen </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63408 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 23:12:20 +0000 slogsweep 63408@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hello, </p> <p>Welcome to these forums, religious OCD is a very common form of OCD and you're not alone. I don't thankfully suffer from this particular form of OCD, but I'm sure it's only a brief matter of time before someone on here with a wealth of experience on the subject comes to help you out. As Wannabe said if you search through old forums there's always one or two in-depth discussions of particular problems such as ROCD, HOCD and POCD etc. </p> <p>I hope this forum helps you out, we're all here to help and this is one of the nicest places on the internet to give and receive help, everyone on here is so understanding and did much to save my life. </p> <p>Best wishes</p> <p>Slog </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63394 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 20:25:29 +0000 Nimrod 63394@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hi Dontwannabenamed,</p> <p>Welcome to the forum. As Wannabefree says there is a lot of information on this website, all useful but a lot of reading.</p> <p>You say you haven't been diagnosed with OCD and I presume with anything else. The first and most important step is to see your GP and tell him/her what you have said here. OCD, in common with other anxiety disorders can be very difficult to diagnose and it can take some time. But the good news is that there is a lot that can be done to help and to make coping easier even before anything is diagnosed. From what you say it could be OCD but the only way to find out if it is OCD or something else is to see your doctor. </p> <p>Best wishes,<br /> Nimrod </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63387 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 18:01:24 +0000 wannabefree 63387@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hi Don'twannabenamed, Welcome to the forums, have a look through the resources section on the top right of this page, it links to lots of things you may well find useful, assuming it is OCD. I just wanted to say hello, even though I am struggling myself right now...<br /> Wannabe </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/help-with-intrusive-thoughts#post-63384 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 17:22:27 +0000 dontwannabenamed 63384@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hey guys, this is my first post on this site so... here goes.</p> <p>I am 16 years old now (17 this year) and i have had intrusive thoughts several times throughout my life. They started when i was around 11-12 then started to die off for a few years, only resurfacing on numerous occasions although i managed to deal with them without much problem. However, i have started to have these thoughts again. They started about a month ago during my school holidays. For some reason, i started having thoughts about the devil, like the thought of it would just pop up in my mind...much to my dislike (I am Christian). Curious, i searched online and learnt what intrusive thoughts were for the first time. I learnt that they were common for people with OCD and anxiety disorders. I felt it a great relief to learn that the thoughts I wasn't the only one with such thoughts. Anyway, i learnt that the best way to combat these thoughts was to accept that they were there and to basically let them be. This worked out well for a couple of weeks but recently, these thoughts have returned a few days ago and i haven't been quite able to get rid of them. I have felt very guilty and i ask myself things like why am i thinking of that? It's not normal and i really dont wanna think about it. It really makes me feel very insecure and that theres something wrong with me? I know deep down that there's nothing wrong with me but i have this shaky feeling that there is something wrong with me...</p> <p>I have talked to my mum briefly about having these intrusive thoughts and I may be meeting a psychologist to ask some questions (I haven't been officialy diagnosed with OCD). Could you guys please give me some advice on how to cope with the problem now? I've read online and i know these thoughts are rather common but mine are of the devil and i haven't seen anyone with those thoughts so far!!</p> <p>Please give me some advice, I feel a lot of guilt and fear that I will not be able to get rid of the thoughts =(</p> <p>Thanks </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/should-i-tell-my-husband-about-my-gay-ocd#post-63334 Sun, 15 Jan 2012 12:03:29 +0000 wannabefree 63334@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Yes, it is strange... But I think it is because we have a shared sort of understanding of what it is like, an empathy, a shared feeling of understanding that helps us to relate to one anothers problems. I honestly wish I hadn't got it, it distresses me so much, but to find others who are going through similar, is a godsend, that I appreciate so very much. It has been a lifesaver for me.<br /> Wannabe </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/should-i-tell-my-husband-about-my-gay-ocd#post-63290 Sat, 14 Jan 2012 09:41:01 +0000 njbu 63290@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>It is a paradox that we can share so openly our ocd with relative 'strangers' (meant in the nicest way) but are unsure about sharing with those we love the most.</p> <p>I like to think that this is because I think I do love all of you and I mean that without gushing - I mean I admire, respect and wholly empathise with living with OCD and I wish I could make all of us better. It is my total recognition for all we go through that binds us.</p> <p>Don't mean to sound all clingy - I'm just saying I guess if I didnt have ocd and I suddenly lived a day in my, or your shoes I would be in awe of the fortitude to function at times.</p> <p>I always ramble - sorry !<br /> &lt;img src=&quot;http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/bb-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif&quot; title=&quot;:-)&quot; class=&quot;bb_smilies&quot; /&gt; </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/should-i-tell-my-husband-about-my-gay-ocd#post-63275 Fri, 13 Jan 2012 20:48:52 +0000 wannabefree 63275@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hi BT and everyone, I agree, I guess some things are best shared only with a professional, they have confidentiality things so should react okay... It is always a risk that things can be 'taken wrong', and we have that with normal issues, never mind the OCD stuff. I've shared lots of stuff, and even though it was taken more or less okay, the reassurance it got me was useless, as reassurance tends to be in OCD. One of the cruel ironys of this illness I guess. It is about ourselves managing to come to terms with everything that is the key... But it isn't easy...<br /> Wannabe </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/should-i-tell-my-husband-about-my-gay-ocd#post-63253 Fri, 13 Jan 2012 13:17:13 +0000 bethany 63253@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Beth, I do appreciate what you and njb are saying. We, of course, have nothing to be ashamed of and in an ideal world everything should be shared with our partners. </p> <p>Alas, so many people are judgemental and ignorant. You may feel that if a person’s partner would leave them for discussing their obsessions, then they are better without that person. However, so many people are ignorant and change will come slowly, I’m afraid. I have shared a few things with my husband and received a shocked response, which affected me deeply. I was told in no uncertain terms that a thought has a basis in desire, otherwise it would not enter my mind. We, and most people on this forum, know that statement to be totally false. It is what revolts us most that we are likely to obsess over. But, my husband is not going to change his mind and so I have no choice but to withhold many of my thoughts from him. </p> <p>I have many friends with OCD who are doing the same with their partners. </p> <p>Also, it isn’t just my husband who reacts negatively. My mother was shocked when I confided a particular obsession and I have lost friends over it. Goodness knows what reaction I would have received if I had discussed my paedophilia fears. </p> <p>Both you and njb have been lucky to have received such sympathetic responses from those in whom you have confided. Sadly, I could list several cases where the opposite has occurred. </p>