http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/tags/hurt It's Time to Act. OCD Action provides support and information for people affected by Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Mon, 21 May 2012 15:20:08 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/search.php http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/if-i-dont-do-it-something-bad-will-happen-wont-it#post-41813 Sat, 29 May 2010 19:41:09 +0000 nigel 41813@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hi,</p> <p>Thank you for all your comments, it's so good to have people who understand (if that makes sense)!</p> <p>I kept repeating an action last year until it felt right but only bad thoughts were in my mind. I was getting annoyed and didn't recognise it as OCD back then and when I had a thought of my idol coming to harm I started focusing on singing his songs as they make me feel better rather than performing the ritual. It was tht night he paased away and it affected me really badly that I ended up travelling around the world just to be near him and saw his coffin.</p> <p>The whole family felt grieve and whilst I was still travelling around trying to figure how I could stop feeling despair a member of my immediately family passed away. Since then I got heavily into religion and sometimes I'm filling in the gaps I'm not sure of and felling something bad will happen if i don't perform certain action. My OCD has spiralled.</p> <p>I haven't had CBT for OCD although when I had it for anxiety a few years ago the checking thing was discussed. I can't seem to bring myself to tell the doctor I feel like a crazy person. Also will it affect future work?</p> <p>Oh, by the way the next episode of OCD Miami is in the Coffee area however it's not great as it's rushed!</p> <p>Take care and thanks.</p> <p>Nigel </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/if-i-dont-do-it-something-bad-will-happen-wont-it#post-41800 Sat, 29 May 2010 15:24:07 +0000 truddles 41800@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hi Nigel,</p> <p>Sorry to hear that you're having such a bad time of it.</p> <p>OCD is such a bully and loves to plant that seed of doubt because once he's planted it he knows that he can get it to grow into a monster.</p> <p>I like you was a constant checker whilst I was out, but have improved. Don't go back to see if you've dropped something because you haven't. If you had you'd know by now that something was missing. Every time you go back to check it reinforces the OCD and the idea that if you don't check it either means you've dropped something or something bad will happen.</p> <p>Forgive me but I can't remember - are you receiving any treatment for your OCD? If not you need to go to your GP and ask to be referred for treatment. CBT would help you to deal with these thoughts (and that's all they are, despite what the OCD says). You can't carry on like this can you? It will eventually if left unchecked impact on your health.</p> <p>Tricia's right when she says<br /> <blockquote>I know it takes immense courage initially, because you will be terrified you are doing the wrong thing by ignoring it, but it’s the only way to prove the OCD wrong and break free of the vicious cycle.</blockquote><br /> It really is the only way. It's not easy, I'm finding it really hard work, but OCD isn't going to win.<br /> With help little by little you will be able to break the vicious circle and regain your confidence.<br /> Try to keep yourself occupied as this can help. How about some more scenes from OCD Miami? Several of us are waiting for the next instalments. </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/if-i-dont-do-it-something-bad-will-happen-wont-it#post-41794 Sat, 29 May 2010 14:44:33 +0000 Anonymous 41794@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Also, there’s a big difference between something called precognition and us having the power to prevent a tragedy by carrying out a ritual. Some people can see events before they happen, but they have absolutely no control over them and they can neither prevent nor cause, harm. </p> <p>I ‘suffered’ precognition and was told by my vicar it was a gift. I found it totally incompatible with OCD and he prayed I would lose the ability to see events before they happened. However, my rituals would have had no effect, it just made me believe that every thought was going to come true. I was relieved to lose the ‘gift’.</p> <p>I don’t know whether you just thought your idol would die, or whether you felt you should carry out some ritual to prevent this from happening but failed to do so. If it’s the latter and that is why you feel so afraid to resist the rituals, I promise you no ritual would have made any difference. It really is the OCD convincing you otherwise. </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/if-i-dont-do-it-something-bad-will-happen-wont-it#post-41792 Sat, 29 May 2010 14:28:20 +0000 Anonymous 41792@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Oh, Nigel, that’s the worst thing to happen, because it just reinforces the OCD. I'm so sorry to hear of that person's death. When you check, or carry out another ritual, and nothing bad happens, you will believe the OCD was right. The only way to prove it wrong, is by ignoring the urge to check. I am so sorry about what happened to your idol, but it’s a very tragic coincidence. </p> <p>A young lady I met on a TV programme was in torment with this kind of OCD. She had resisted her obsessions on one occasion and her grandfather died. This made her OCD even worse, because she became convinced that if she had carried out the ritual he would have lived.</p> <p>We truly can’t have an effect on the lives of others in this way, or on our own health.</p> <p>Talking of health. Mine has deteriorated over the last ten years. I no longer have the energy to go out. I was diagnosed with M.E. many years ago and my doctor believes the OCD is to blame. What I am saying is that your health will suffer more if you do carry out your compulsions. I know it takes immense courage initially, because you will be terrified you are doing the wrong thing by ignoring it, but it’s the only way to prove the OCD wrong and break free of the vicious cycle.</p> <p>What help are you getting, Nigel?</p> <p>Tricia x </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/if-i-dont-do-it-something-bad-will-happen-wont-it#post-41791 Sat, 29 May 2010 14:24:19 +0000 Anonymous 41791@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hi Nigel, you say that you get the feeling something bad will happen quite a lot and seem to get over it. It was just a coincidence once when your idol passed away. Your OCD is trying to take a coincidence as evidence. Try to think of all the times when it did not come true. I remember reading about a boy who thought he had caused the falling of the twin towers in America because of his OCD, but because of the difference in time zones his therapist was able to show him that it could not have been something he did or did not do (sorry I cannot remember the details fully). </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/if-i-dont-do-it-something-bad-will-happen-wont-it#post-41790 Sat, 29 May 2010 13:57:10 +0000 nigel 41790@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hi, I think I'm going to explodewith anxiety and I would please appreciate someone explaining my thoughts to me...pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeessssssssssseeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</p> <p>I went to visit a grave last Sunday, and like usual i had to check repeately that i hadnt dropped something. this time i seemed to check a lot more than usual and then i drove around again to check if i had dropped something twice.</p> <p>i still had this feeling that i may have dropped something on the other side of the grave even though i checked so many times (well the doubt now says i think i did).</p> <p>I have gone a week without going back telling myself i wud pop back soon. its 60 miles one way! anyway today ive had a great urge to go check! im not suppoed to be going for a few more weeks but i stopped the urge by thinking i will have arange somethink that will mean i will be in the area and i can check.</p> <p>However I am going out tommorrow night and i keep getting a feeling that if i dont check before i go out tommorrow night something bad will happen to my health. I do this quite a lot and i seem to get over it. However whilst im typing this i have remembered one occasion when it came true.</p> <p>I had a thought of someone famous getting hurt. I said it was ocd and on that evening last June, my idol passed away.</p> <p>Can anyone explain why i think someting bad will happen if i dont check?</p> <p>Thanks</p> <p>Nigel </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/hurting-loved-one#post-38179 Mon, 15 Feb 2010 09:29:21 +0000 Cuthbert ffoliott 38179@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hiya Adrian -</p> <p>first: you have my sympathy, and that of all others here, I dare to say. </p> <p>Thanks for being so open about it. I would say that you need not worry that you will 'realize' that which you so dread. Because people with obssessions generally are folks with an 'overdeveloped' conscience. Feelings of guilt may play a major role. Where that guilt stems from, that is not crucial; what is crucial is that in your mind, feelings of guilt (in general, not specific) may be converted to obsessions that you, being 'guilty', may perform a bad act.</p> <p>Please don't take all of this too literal. It is a possible story about how OCD vexes us. Guilt can make us think of any 'worst possible act'; and that can well be hurting someone we dearly love. It is a mean way in which OCD may work. Other people drive a car, and are constantly plagued by the idea that they have just run over a child; they must turn back and look at the road, to make sure they did not do that; as a result, they always arrive too late. It's one of many, many examples.</p> <p>The act you fear is usually performed by people with extreme tendencies towards impulsive behaviour, and with problems concerning the way their conscience works (it may be dysfunctional, or absent at certain times).</p> <p>Everything in your letter says to me that you are quite the opposite of those people: very scrupulous, very conscientious.</p> <p>I know: perhaps this does not help you in any practical way. It may not alleviate your worries. </p> <p>I deeply respect and admire the fact that you let your wife in on your 'secret'. This is no doubt the first and necessary step to real healing.</p> <p>Feel free to comment, criticize, and/or PM me at any time. Then I'll try to answer ASAP.</p> <p>Ciao, and all the best, Cuthbert. </p> http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/topic/hurting-loved-one#post-38163 Sun, 14 Feb 2010 20:11:44 +0000 adesweb 38163@http://www.ocdaction.org.uk/forums/ <p>Hi,</p> <p>I have always been a worrier all my life, quite reserved, and quiet person. I have been with my wife for a year and a half, we recently married in the UK and are going to Kenya (she is Kenyan) to renew our vows in a couple of weeks.</p> <p>The problem I have started around Christmas time. I had these imaginations/thoughts that I was hurting or killing her. The main thing was stangling her, and I think it started as a result of computer games, or TV, although they were not horror (I have never liked anyway), just games and TV with moderate violence. I managed to use a lot of self-help services like the Internet, or books, and recently had managed to accept the thoughts rather than negetivley react to them, and this was definitley starting to help. I find stuck around the house worse, and this weekend we wen to her sisters which definitley helped. However on return today, I was still feeling fine, and coping well, but then I had these thoughts as we were dancing together and I reached to simply place my hand very gently around her throat. I felt disgusted that I had even gone as far as to do that and let it get me upset again, although perhaps it was just me 'testing' to see if I still had control over my actions. I don't feel I was thinking about killing her, simply obsessing for a few seconds, about the thought of her throught or strangulation. </p> <p>We have discussed several times, and she understands although clearly it has been upsetting for both of us, and I don't want to make things worse by going to someone where I may have to release all of the thoughts again. I would rather forgot and try and deal with it, if the acceptance method is going to keep helping. I really thought things were getting easier, and has brought books such as Overcoming Obsessive Thoughts' I don't beleive I would ever hurt her, and was fustrated by what hapened today, but I thought I would post a message on her anyway in case anyone has had similar sitatuions happen, and the best way to cure the obessive thoughts forever.</p> <p>Adrian </p>